Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Mercy, Mercy!

Well, we're back. We had a great trip to CO and I have pictures to share - except I can't find my silly USB chord. I may have left it in CO? Maybe it's in that one random suitcase pocket where you find treasures you thought were long gone until the next time you go on a trip? Maybe a certain toddler ran off with it and who knows where I'll find it? Regardless, I have to figure something out because my memory card is full. And you'll know when I find it because there will be pictures on the blog!

Right now I feel a tad bit overwhelmed with all that there is to do around here. To be honest, I don't know where to start. I am tired. Rightly so, because both of my children are having sleeping issues. My toddler doesn't want to go to bed without Mama by his side. Every night we have had a long battle of the will over staying in bed. The battle ends way too late and my personal time is gone.

Then it happens again at about 3 AM - only this time he is so scared because no one is awake. This wakes up baby brother. You get the picture. I am so sleepy and tired. And grumpy.

Mama was definitely a bear this morning. It's so hard to be merciful and loving when disobedience and disrespect are present. My attitude and words this morning have been pretty grrrrowwwllly. This morning we went to story time at the library. It took way too much effort to get us all out of the door and into the car. When we arrived,(20 minutes late) I opened the van door to see two sets of very precious eyes looking at me. The blue eyes of Little One danced with anticipation for what we were off to do. Baby Brother's deep brown eyes followed his big brother's lead and just smiled broadly. And in that moment, I wanted to just sit down and have a good cry.

After a rough morning, (and night too) they still look to me with all of the admiration and trust that is so endearing. What a gift. What a huge responsibility!

On my refrigerator I have a poster that reads Micah 7:18 "God Delights In Showing Mercy." My poster is an every day, or some days, every moment, reminder that I need to show mercy to myself - as well as show mercy to my family. And to thank him that he shows his mercy to me every single day. This morning was not a morning with a whole lot of mercy on my part. I am hoping to change that this afternoon. The boys are sleeping right now -I'm going to go refresh myself, and hope we can have a mercy filled fun afternoon - and get things back on track.

And, maybe I'll come across the USB chord. Lord, have Mercy! :)

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