It is 4:00 in the morning and sleep is far from me. I feel that I am awake due to a caffeine overdose, but that's not the case. My head and heart are swirling after watching this. I DVR'D it because I don't like to watch these kind of shows during the day with the babes around. Hubs and I watched it last night, and based on my reaction, I have more healing and processing to do. All I could do was sit and cry. Old 2 year old wounds revisited, reopened. Ouch. Lord, please make the bitterness become sweet.
That is one big element to my open eyes. The other element is that both baby brother and little one are sleeping in my room - and hubs is on the couch. Why you ask? Carpet cleaning. I had had scheduled to get our carpets cleaned yesterday afternoon. This was a company I had never used - and boy am I regretful. First off, he was two hours late. I should have just stopped the madness right then and there. My gut told me to. But I had spent most of the afternoon getting ready for it. The guy took forever, and didn't leave until 8:30. On top of that, it's pretty darn cold here these days - and he had to have the front door open most of the time. So, I have two cold kids who are way past bedtime, and there is no way that we can get their room to a sleep able condition before the morning. So, I put Little One in our bed and pulled out the pack and play. Tonight is not a night I want to snuggle my toddler, I need the comfort and nearness of my sweet hubs. And he's been kicked out to the couch.
Here's the kicker. The guy did a horrible job. The floor is still sopping wet in places. It is damp,cold, smells weird and doesn't even look clean. I worry that the little ones will catch a cold. All of that madness for nothing - only to create more work. I imagine I'll be on the phone tomorrow, fighting for our money back and finding someone else to fix it.
These kind of things always seem so much worse in the wee hours of the morning. Hopefully it's not as bad as I think it is.
So, it's now 4:30. Do I try to go back to sleep - or do I just get up? I can't really do anything in much of the house - hubs sleeping on the couch and the rest of the house is soaking. Maybe I head to the gym and get some of this pent up energy out. But that makes for such a long day.
On a happy note, my mom booked a flight out here for Valentines day weekend. She is going to stay with the kids while Hubs and I have a weekend away. We've only done this once since we've been married with kids. And, I am so looking forward to it.
Well, that's it for now...