Rest.less.

It is 4:00 in the morning and sleep is far from me. I feel that I am awake due to a caffeine overdose, but that's not the case. My head and heart are swirling after watching this. I DVR'D it because I don't like to watch these kind of shows during the day with the babes around. Hubs and I watched it last night, and based on my reaction, I have more healing and processing to do. All I could do was sit and cry. Old 2 year old wounds revisited, reopened. Ouch. Lord, please make the bitterness become sweet.

That is one big element to my open eyes. The other element is that both baby brother and little one are sleeping in my room - and hubs is on the couch. Why you ask? Carpet cleaning. I had had scheduled to get our carpets cleaned yesterday afternoon. This was a company I had never used - and boy am I regretful. First off, he was two hours late. I should have just stopped the madness right then and there. My gut told me to. But I had spent most of the afternoon getting ready for it. The guy took forever, and didn't leave until 8:30. On top of that, it's pretty darn cold here these days - and he had to have the front door open most of the time. So, I have two cold kids who are way past bedtime, and there is no way that we can get their room to a sleep able condition before the morning. So, I put Little One in our bed and pulled out the pack and play. Tonight is not a night I want to snuggle my toddler, I need the comfort and nearness of my sweet hubs. And he's been kicked out to the couch.

Here's the kicker. The guy did a horrible job. The floor is still sopping wet in places. It is damp,cold, smells weird and doesn't even look clean. I worry that the little ones will catch a cold. All of that madness for nothing - only to create more work. I imagine I'll be on the phone tomorrow, fighting for our money back and finding someone else to fix it.

These kind of things always seem so much worse in the wee hours of the morning. Hopefully it's not as bad as I think it is.

So, it's now 4:30. Do I try to go back to sleep - or do I just get up? I can't really do anything in much of the house - hubs sleeping on the couch and the rest of the house is soaking. Maybe I head to the gym and get some of this pent up energy out. But that makes for such a long day.

On a happy note, my mom booked a flight out here for Valentines day weekend. She is going to stay with the kids while Hubs and I have a weekend away. We've only done this once since we've been married with kids. And, I am so looking forward to it.

Well, that's it for now...

How we spent most of the day....

Waiting,

Waiting,

And more waiting for the pool to open! And once it was opened - boy did we have fun!

Unlimited Miniature Ice Cream Cones...who could ask for more?

There was a lazy river - and didn't take Little One long to figure out how to "swim" with his life jacket on. A life jacket and swimming lessons are in our near future!

There was on site child care - which was awesome. They did a great job taking care of the kids. It was especially nice during naptime or when they had had enough sun. During the afternoon the kids went to Kids Kamp - and mom and dad were on our own. Yippee!!

Baby Brother taking in the sun.

Little One was not crazy about the beach or ocean. We spent one morning on the beach with him - and that's all we could get from him. But, we made the best out of that morning - Sand castles, swimming, and we even tried to take a giant tricycle out into the water. (Dad and Little One jumped ship and it ended up being Mom on the giant tricycle...:)

Going to E*l*m*o's House!

The way we made it through two plane rides and one hour and a half bus ride to the resort was that we told Little One we were going to see where the big red monster lives. And, boy does he have a great house!

The resort is a sponsor of S*same S*treet and we are now really good friends with the gang. In fact, Little One is in the bath tub right now and the only toy he wanted his rubber ducky. Our conversation went like this:
"Hey Mom - can you say Hi to Ernie and his Rubber Duck?"(Referring to himself, of course)
"Hi Ernie! Hi Rubber Ducky!"
"Hi Bert! How you doin today?"

We were promised S*same S*reet - and that is exactly what we got. Parades, shows, and everyday there was an opportunity to do something with one of the characters. (Bake cookies with Cookie, Dance with Zoe, etc...) We even had breakfast with all of them, and a dance party to start the day.

So, here's a few of the monster friends we encountered...



Little One was in his element to play guitar with these guys. He had a really hard time sharing the guitar with the others... He still talks about how he could only play ONE SONG!

One of my favorite characters - Miss Abby Cadabby!

To touch her wings or not?

Cookie was full of dance moves and hugs. He was so fun to watch and interact with.
Little One had a BLAST dancing at the evening shows.

Thanks E*lmo for letting us come - we had a great time! :)

It's all in the name...

At a Christmas Party there's a little girl who is playing and chasing Little One. After about 20 minutes of play she comes to me and says: "Is his name really Buzz?" (We were on a major Toy Story kick at the time.)

In Jamaica he finds a little dance partner who has some pretty great moves. The two little toddlers danced the night away. The little girl's mom went up to Little One and asked his name - and his response - "Thomas". (We're on a serious Thomas the Train kick right now...) "Oh Thomas! You are a great dancer! Look at Thomas go! Bye Thomas, we'll see you tomorrow!"

So, when there are girls to impress, you've got to be cool. He's got that one down. :)

Jamaica - ooh I wanna take ya....

We're home - and we had a fabulous time! It was a week in paradise, to say the least. Here are some pics of the grounds of the resort - so beautiful! We didn't even leave the resort - there was so much to do there. Lots of time spent on the beach or poolside - resting and relaxing. Lots of time playing in the water. Lots of great quality time with Hubs and the kids. This trip was just what we needed.

There were all sorts of activities available - hobbie sailing, water skiing, snorkeling, diving - Hubs did it all! I snorkeled, but preferred sitting on the beach and reading a good book.

My reading spot. Check out these bed cabanas. If you rent them for a day, your meals and drinks are brought to you - actually anything you could need. We didn't rent one - but it's top on my list next time! :)

A room with a view... You can't really tell from the photo, but the ocean is right outside our room. This is the balcony from our room.

Little One had a grand time exploring. I love this picture because it is a perfect example of how we spent a lot of our time with him - We'd find something of interest and by the time I could pull out my camera to take pics, he was off to something else.

I took a ton of pictures - plus they had professionals walking around the grounds snapping shots - so I have about 250 pictures of our trip! Now, don't worry, I won't bore you with all of them, but will post some of the best in the coming days.

The Lack of Blog Attention Will Continue...

I know, my blog posts have been few and far between. Trying to establish a new routine, trying to get back into the grove after the holiday travel, tending to a toddler with a stomach bug... leaves very little time to blog.

Yes, my sweet toddler had a stomach bug. He probably picked it up at the pediatrician office last week when we took Baby Brother in because of a green gucky nose that wouldn't let up. The antibiotics cleared up the nose in a matter of hours. No such luck for Little One. We have had five days of yuck. Today, I think we're in the clear. I know he was so hungry - yesterday he kept asking to eat meatballs. At the end of the day I finally gave in and gave him some food of substance, only to have it backfire. Darn. Today we are sticking to the good old BRAT (Bananas, Rice, Applesauce and Toast) diet.

But another thing has been keeping me busy - we are going on a family vacation on Saturday and I've been getting ready. I'm pretty excited. The whole family is going to Jamaica for a week. I CAN'T WAIT! My husband works for a very generous and awesome man, who is giving us this gift. How amazing is that? Here's the deal. We have never really been on a vacation. Sure, we've been on trips to visit family - but never a sit on the beach, do nothing but really enjoy one another, get away from every day life, kind of trip. I think it's going to be such a fun time. I'm really looking forward to getting some much needed rest and relaxation. I'm looking forward to connecting with my hubby. I'm looking forward to introducing the ocean and sand castles to Little One.

So, I can tell you the blog will be silent for a week or two - I'm going computerless - and looking forward to that too.

I'll be sure to post when we're back!

~Rebecca

Best shots of Christmas...

Brother Hugs...Nana and Baby Brother....

"Oh Wow! What could it be?"

Papa and Baby Brother...

Trying to get a good shot with cousin Jullian in their Christmas Jammies...

Baby Brother flirting with Grandma...

Road Trip! Notice the new DVD player. Little One is convinced that it's his computer. Most of the way to CO we heard from the back seat: "Don't touch my computer, guys..." over and over. I think he's got the message...

Making sock puppets from this book. So much fun! Thanks Julie for the fun Christmas craft! :)

Biting off more than I can chew.

Well, it's 5:30 AM on a Sunday morning. Baby brother awoke at 4:00 ready to eat. And after his early breakfast, we had a lovely chat. We're discovering that he has much to say when his big brother isn't around. When the house is quiet, that's when our Baby Brother comes alive. He coos and squeals very loudly. When Big brother is around, Baby just watches with undying attention.

Anyway, I have some thoughts regarding the holidays that have been musing in this head of mine. This holiday season was a huge learning curve for me. (Thus the silence on my blog.) This being our third Christmas as a married couple and my first Christmas as a mother of two, I feel that I have much to master in the area of traditions and celebrating. Sometimes I wish that my sweet husband and I had a little more time to establish things prior to having children. Now, I am not saying that I regret the children or anything like that. I just find it difficult to learn how to be a wife, while learning how to be a mom and establishing our home in the midst of it all. It's a lot to take in.

Which brings me to the subject of traditions. At the beginning of December I had the realization that this would be our first Christmas in Texas away from family - and that I needed to start establishing some good family traditions. Despite the fact we were going to CO for Christmas, I wanted to have our own family celebration. To begin making our own traditions. So, we scheduled to have our "family Christmas" the morning we were scheduled to leave town. BIG MISTAKE. Because, it seemed that really the only person who cared about this event was me. And in my effort to make a special holiday memory, (such as staying up until 2:00 AM to make sure everything was just right) no one else seemed to care and I completely wore myself out. After our "celebration" (complete with a husband and wife tiff) we hustled and bustled about getting ready to leave. We were driving to CO and had planned to leave town at 3:00 pm. That plan was quickly altered when I couldn't find my drivers license. I looked high and low - made many phone calls...only to find nothing. So, I took the kids to a friend's house and made my way to the DMV t0 get a new license. Thankfully, the wait was only 20 minutes - whereas I waited three hours when I went this past summer!

And after much ado and leaving an embarrassingly messy house behind, (I hate coming home to a messy house when coming home from vacation!!) we were on the road at about 8:00. On our way out of the door, I began feeling sick. And, it took us 5 hours to drive 200 miles. Ugh.

During some period during those first 200 miles, while doing a mental check list of things...it hit me. I had packed for and thought of everyone else but me. I had forgotten so many of my own things. I realized on that dark highway that it didn't even cross my mind to bring my coat (although I had been looking high and low for one for Little One all week - it's hard to find a good winter coat in a warm climate!). I left all of my jewelry in my jewelry box. Including the lovely necklace Hubs gave me that morning for Christmas. I left it on the kitchen counter. And, there are other things that I forgot, but are better left unnamed. If I would have been by myself in that moment I would have burst into tears. I was spent and had nothing to show for it.

What am I going to different next year?
I've decided that where ever we are on Christmas Day - this is where we will celebrate. Or, maybe have our own celebration after we get back. But trying to cram it all in before hand and getting ready to leave town is too much for this mamma to handle. I've decided to just let the traditions happen. To ponder the little things in my heart, and remember and build on them next year. With time, the traditions will develop. I can set the stage, but cannot force them.

And then, there is the care of me. I feel at times, so worn out and exhausted. The demands. Unrealistic and realistic. The unnecessary and necessary. Where do I go in the midst of it all? This is one thing that I am really hoping to change this year. I have discovered that I need time. I need a few hours a week - and a few days a quarter to be in silence and on my own. I want to read, learn and listen, yet find it impossible right now. I am craving routine, and am willing to do what ever to make it happen. Perhaps building some alone time into our routines will be just what I need. I am reminded of the commonly used illustration of the instructions of the flight attendant - "when the air mask drops be sure to attach your own before helping others..." I need to take the initiative to care for myself if I am going to do a good job caring for the rest of my precious family. Otherwise, I have nothing to draw from. I am giving from an empty cup - which is nothing pretty.

I have also been referred to FLYlady.net - and am finding her simple instruction very helpful. Some days (ok, most days) I just need someone to tell me what to do. I think I'm a fan.

Back to the trip. We stopped in Abilene, and my doctor called in a prescription for me. Once we got a handle on my little bout, we hit the road hard. And arrived in Colorado Springs late that evening. We had a lovely stay - we stayed at our dear friend's house while they were out of town. It was very nice to have a home away from home. During our visit I was able to visit with my friends Monica and Carrie, which was a very sweet (although too short) time. And of course, it was so good to see family. It was a good time. Later today I will post some photos of our visit.

BTW - I found my lost license last night. Guess where it was? At the bottom of the toy box...Go figure.... :)

January 1, 2009

This is what we were up to today -

Loads and more loads...

Thomas, Thomas and more Thomas. Andrew, we wish you were here to play!

Bye, Bye Christmas Decor - see ya in about 330 Days!

Some genuine Bowl watching...

Daddy wasn't quite ready to get up.

Happy 2009 from our family to yours!